Monday, November 28, 2005

come with me

today was fine fine fine.

firstly met the boyfriend at bishan.
went around to find his pants.
we landed in bossini.
and YEAY! he finally found the perfect pants.
to match his outfit.
at a very reasonable price too.
(: happy moment number 1.

then we headed down to town.
while on the train.
sabrinah called because she's having a headache finding the perfect outfit for farewell.
since i was heading down town.
met her and yassir.
both having headache.
cannot find any.
met them at far east.
finally saw lynn and azahar.
after so many days.
(: happy moment number 2.

after so-called lunch at puncak.
walked to wisma atria.
find for sabrinah her dress.
looked around a few shops.
nice but not appropriate.
finally! saw, this funky dress.
(: happy moment number 3.

we head down to heeren after that.
walked around.
looked at this and that.
finally found what i've been looking for at heeren.
(: happy moment number 4.

yipppeee. yippee.
i'm in the middle of a conversation with boyfriend.
taraaaa. (:


i have a big big big phobia.
other than cats, dogs, mammals. etc.
just hopefully, it won't occur.
not again.

i realize i'm an insecure human being.
and i think too much.
like honestly.
every single that i see, hear. etc.
i wonder whether i make the people i love happy.
or is it just the other way round?
do i make you happy?
tell me.

these are just random entries.
i wanna go-go banging.
but no can do.
i'm strong enough.
okay, i'm going bonkers.

what is it with you people and baihakki la?
lay it off la.
it's not that i'm gonna marry him.
eventhough i wish i could.
but, he's attached la please.
i don't care if baihakki don't score goals.
just the presence of him on the field is good enough.

i'm an overly obsessive girl too.
figure that out yourself.
whether it's true or not.

i need the beach.
and some retail theraphy.
without guilt.
with my beloved lynn.
i miss bitching with her.
chilling at starbucks.
bloody hell need my ice cocoa.
and subway's cookies.

to err is human. to rectify is glory. -____________________-

Sunday, November 27, 2005

let it lead

i finished doing all my housework.
except for the part.
that i have to clear the books and papers in my room.

normal to have cramps on the first day of periods.
yes. bloody periods.
yes. periods are bloody.
OBVIOUSLY. cause there's blood involved.
the uterus lining is shed.

okay. phone rang.

Saturday, November 26, 2005

my everything

h a fiz a, Monday, October 18, 2004:

pai pai... how can i ever express my love for you in just 1000 words?
haha. this lovable guy. my big bad bastard. my girlfriend. my shopping partner.
my gay pimp. oops. my, my... EVERYTHING. ooh ya... my sushi guy. my companion.
my adviser. my listener. my gay boy. my dustbin. my if-i-wanna-spend-money-spend-on-him guy.
my lame boy. haha. my sweetheart. my darling. my pai-i'm-bored-let's-go-out fashion consultant.
my food taster. my victim of bully. haha. i can go on. my web layout consultant. haha.
i wanna make this 1000. my pai-i'm-hungry-let's-go-eat-no-money-i-pay. my pai pai.
my lovely. my honey. my jukebox. my entertainer. my mangkok. my blur sotong.
my i'm lost for words. you know why i write you testi? because i miss you!!!!!!!
haha. my shout out board. my encyclopedia. haha. man.. i really miss you.
i know you miss me too. haha. i dunno how life will be like. life sure will be miserable.
no light. no you. =( sheesh.
i'm sounding like a gf. i'm not his gf. i'm his best buddy!!!

i know i still love him. till this very day. (:


i saw a sexy pair of red heels.
automatically, fell in love with it.
but, that wasn't what i was looking for.

was on the bus. on the way back from bishan.
the match between Singapore & Laos.
was telecasting(?) on TvMobile.
i think i know the reason why local soccer is interesting to me.
two words; Baihakki Khaizan.
well, maybe.
but, such an irony.
when there was once, he was just behind me.
i wasn't really ga-ga-ing.
i wonder.
and i heard he's dating someone i DON'T like.
a celebrity.
hope they don't last long.

hey hello

i've applied for that 3 months course thingy at MI.
first choice Arts @ MI-T.
hopefully, i get there la.
hopefully, i don't get MI-B.
it's so ULU.

and MI-T is near cik alip's place.
and i can just slack there every other day.
or if i have no money for food.
anyway, she's one of my guardian.
cause she's my mummy's sister.
cause she's my favourite aunttt. (:

now, i see the light. (:

Friday, November 25, 2005


dateline for 3 months course application ends tomorrow at 4pm.
shit. and i'm still contemplating on it.

you guys shall tag and tag for all i care.
i am so not gonna reply.
especially to YOU.
i'm lazy. bum bum bum.

i've been towning for days.
still haven't get the boyfriend anything for farewell.
still feel bad.
he got angry at me.
we could have just avoid that if i had just opened my mouth and voice out my opinions.
stupid stupid you.

never judge a book by it's cover.
never underestimate people.
never never never BOAST.
and think that you're bigger than somebody.
and think that you're much better.
if you really can, prove it.
even if you wanna prove it.
lay low.
you might never know when you will fall.
maybe tomorrow, maybe next week.
don't be full of yourself.
be humble.
it always works.

so longg. taraaa.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005


relationships are a two way thing.
whether it's boy-girl, girl-girl, boy-boy. etc
the thing is that there's the boy, and there's the girl.
so, there is the two of you in the relationship.

you can never tell how a relationship is like by just looking at the couple.
doesn't mean the couple is always together, to and fro, they are perfect.
or stable.
you don't know what is really happening behind that relationship.
the only people that knows about it is the people in the relationship itself.

when a couple have an argument.
look into it and don't just come to a conclusion.
never pint point whose fault, or who caused the argument.
you might be the one who pint points, but you're the one at fault.
solve the problem, befor resorting to anything.
like for example a break up.

i had a talk with sabrinah just now.
normal girl talk.
opened up my horizon.
made me think.
i nearly cried.
haha. bitch.
but it was good.
all the more.
i love that bugger to bits and pieces.

O's are over.
now, i'm left with nothing to do.
no mugging.
no going to school.
suddenly, i feel so bored.

Monday, November 21, 2005


the photos are here.

please CLICK HERE for more. (:

i simply loved the weekend.
12 hours of visiting on saturday.
slacking session at faisal's open house on sunday.

Sunday, November 20, 2005

a smile

raya-ing with the 4es was superb la.
9 houses, more than 12 hours. blistered feet.
long bus rides. long walking distances.

if A picture tells A thousand words.

i seriously dunno what to say.
they was ga-zillion photos la.
i'll update later. (:
faisal's house is open today.
meeting the couple of the year and rudy later.
faisal's mum's briyani HERE I COME!
after that the toilet.

Thursday, November 17, 2005


accounts paper 1 was a-ok.
haha. very far from the paper 2.
just felt like laughing.

2 more papers to go and i'm a free bird!
hopefully, biology doesn't go against me.

the plans are to go raya-ing with my beloved sayangss this saturday.
still need to confirm.

4es, any of you free on the satruday?
go raya-ing!
we gonna go cikgu's house too.
since, she's having an open house. (:

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

corner of my eye

flunk it.
i foresee myself flunking 2 subjects.
principles of accounts paper 2 decided to go against us.

haha. i think i'm a hypocrite.
but, it makes me happy.
not in that way.
but, not in this way either.
OH! you guys just won't understand.

i'm going bonkers.
let me enlighten you with the lyrics to the song ONE SWEET DAY.
i was watching MTV Pick&Play just now.
and this song came on.
reminded me of those nights where i cried my heart out.
cause i did some stupid things in life.
i'll post it later.

i wanna mug for Food & Nutrition.
i totally wanna ACE it la.
i wanna be a nutritionist.
i'm serious.

*sings doooo yyyyyoooooooooouu wanttttttt meeeeee?
liiiiiiiiikkkkkkkkeeeeeeeee iiiii wwwwwaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnt yyyyyyyyyyyoooooouuuuuuuu.....

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

can't take it

i just wanna say this uh.
so, you buggers out there.
if you have a bestf, treasure him/her like there's no tomorrow.
don't wait till you lose him/her or whatever.

all the years we've known each other.
i think both of us picked up the telephatic skills.
he doesn't need to say, or tell.
i would already know.

so, i met mr BFF for lunch just now.
after accounts class, and before his amaths paper.
he had his 10 hours of sleep like he planned.
had lunch at burger king.
while eating, the pussycat dolls - don't cha music video keeps popping at that bloody big screen at HDB hub.
he was practically drooling.
they used to show sugababes - push the button too.
but, too bad there wasn't any today.
dammit! i love the music video.
one the guys is HOT.
okay back, after lunch. went to starhub.
to register the prepaid cards.
but, the server was down.
bloody hell!!!
haha. then BFF sent me home.
waited with him for 93 to come.
20 whole minutes.
bleah. this makes me love BFF more.

and he still haven't get the lyrics to because of you.
in no rush.
soon, you'll understand. (:
listening to Panic! At the Disco.

Monday, November 14, 2005


i had alot to blog about yesterday.
but, then.
i don't really have the time.
i need to study badly.
bleah. i skipped accounts class today.
no idea why.

i missed watching ranma 1/2 on AXN.
unfortunately, they don't show them anymore.
something about japanese anime that catches my attention.
ANIME ah. not HENTAI ah please!

i was in the toilet, then a memory rushed into my head.
one sunny saturday morning.
everything fell into place the moment i stepped out of the house.
i wish i could go back in time.
but, now is fine. (:

the other night met my BFF. (:
he passed me DUNKIN DONUTS!!!!!!!!
yeay. it's been forever since i had them.
bleah. and i forgot there was putri salat at home.
so, i didn't pack for him any.
haha. too bad lor.

so, yeah met the BFF who suffers from haemophobia.
then we slacked somewhere.
just talked, chatted, etc etc etc. haha.
then suddenly out of the blue i asked "do you think you'll ever get married?"
both of us think it's leceh but then again.
both of us think that we want someone to take care of us.
when we are old and all.
well, let's just let fate decides.
then i asked him another question "if you're married, then later your wife wanna give birth how? will you be by her side? *grin"
note that he's haemophobic.

sometimes i scare myself, thinking that i suffer from appendicitis.
sheesh. been getting pain at that area.
oh whatever.
one thing for sure, i got my bowels deficiency from my dad.

[editted] i think i know what type of guys i'm after.
other than the dark haired, small eyes ones.
i have no idea but i find GEEKS hot.
now now, BFF. i know you're a self-confessed geek.
but, you come under a different type of hot.
hehehe. *evil laugh

Saturday, November 12, 2005

current earwax - chantal kreviazuk : i'm leaving on a jet plane

i'm in much need of
  1. sugababes.
  2. brown VANS slip-ons.
  3. a good wax.
  4. lady speed stick.
  5. more cranberry paraphenalia.
  6. Vitamin D, sunlight.
  7. the beach.
  8. a tan.
  9. not to spend my hari raya money.
  10. a hug from (fill in name here).
  11. a geography revision.
  12. a bucking up in accounts.
  13. a revision on my ever so favourite BIOL-OGY.

the list goes on and on.
chatted with nurul/lulu.
she just came back from OBS.
i miss my days at OBS.
haha. then we were talking about family.
when they come for raya.
:rolls eyes:


rudolph the red nose reindeer.
well, it actually reminds me of one time.
you were sneezing/cold, then your nose was super red.
and i called you, (fill in name here) the red nose reindeer.

i don't know whether you remembered.

am so gonna flunk my maths.

Friday, November 11, 2005


studied with linda, lun, rudy, terence and (fills in name here). (:
if you don't know the name, you're dumb.

i wasted my time going to the north pole to find rudolph the red nose reindeer.
he has always been in front of me.
right not, (fills in name here)?
hehe. (:

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

more than words

i'm back from the north pole.
i just decided to come back.

i have a problem with myself.
i managed to screw things up AGAIN.
food, sleep and tears are becoming my foes all over again.
i don't know why i have to screw things up with people, specifically someone that i need most.

and all i do is say sorry.
though i mean all off it, but it seems meaningless right now.
and forever.

i realize i treat my friends like crap.
and never thought bout what my bestf thinks.
i was never there for him.
i screw things up again, and again and again.
i never changed.
thinking i did.
if only time could be reversed.
i would do anything to mend my ways.
but it's now too late.

i forsake months, years of what i would like to say.
the happiest moments of my life.
i screw things up cause of my snobbish, self-centered and selfish ways.
i lost that part of me so badly.
i don't know how to be strong again.

why do i treat the person i love most like crap?
i still don't understand that part of me.
big time.
why you?
why did you have to get the pain?
why did i have to hurt you?
why did you get my empty promises?
have i always been like this?
was this how i showed love to you?

i wished you never knew me.
so, your life will be safe and sound.
away from the pain i give you every single day.

i'm listening to more than words.
like you asked me too.
i'll still keep the dumb dried leaf i picked up.
and the dried up roses which was once fresh 7 months ago.

i'll do anything.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

hung up

i'm off to the north pole to visit rudolph the red nose reindeer.
don't find me.
i don't know when i'll be back.

Monday, November 07, 2005


i'm still am the big big big big inconsiderate/clingy/selfish jerk i am.

i screw things up like no one's business.
and put everything at risk.
even the person i love most.

when someone gets caught up with things, they tend to forget about the people who care for them.
forgive me?

Saturday, November 05, 2005

growing up

the brother.

the sister.

the siblings. the only ones in singapore. (:

happy ending

happy eid-mubarak. (:
selamat hari raya. mohon maaf zahir dan batin.
i seek forgiveness for all my wrongdoings.
from the bottome of my heart. (:

to those taking their very-imporatant-that-is-gonna-determine-your-future-examanitions.
or in short the O' Levels.
we can do it. we can pull through.
buckk up. which includes me too.

i love you all. (:

Tuesday, November 01, 2005


i tear my heart open, i sew myself shut
my weakness is that i care too much
and my scars remind us that the past is real
i tear my heart open just to feel
- Papa Roach : Scars

am getting sappier.
and sappier.
and sappier.
and sappier.
wait! is there such a word sappier?

i'm guilt-ridden every other day.
for the rest of my life.
bleahh. sappy.


[editted] :
i was reading sharifah's blog. she talked about that after iftar slacking session.
where we had yassir doing a dare.
he had to go down on his knees and explain to sabrinah about some stuff.
and to apologize too.
that, i guess was the most beautiful love scene ever.
beats those in the movies from hollywood, bollywood and whatever wood there is.
i wish i could rewind back to that very moment to feel that adrenaline rush again.
sabrinah's lucky to have yassir.
and yassir's lucky to have sabrinah.
that touching moment makes me smile EVERYTIME.

wise words of norhafizah mohd. nabi
"shit ah! i don't have boyfriend."